Sunday, March 18, 2012

Watch my mind! By Lisa D.



Two years ago, my Section Européenne class set up an Arts exhibition on the theme of self-portraits entitled “Me, Myself and I”.

We had to create a unique and inspired version of ourselves and put it on paper, or on video, or whatever medium we chose. We tried to define ourselves in a way we had never thought about before, and yet, it still had to match our personalities.

I started the project with a friend based on the theme “If I were Black or Asian”. We took portraits of ourselves and “Photoshoped” them in order to create another “us”. Our intention was to show the public that no matter where you come from, what you look like, your appearance doesn’t change who you truly are. On another level, we tried to answer certain questions, or at least unravel teenagers’ wonderings about change. Because it is a troubling period where everything changes, your body, your mind, your friends… We showed them that even if you physically evolve in this period of your life, you don’t necessarily erase what made you who you are. You remain the same, you are just different : you are growing...

But, I abandoned this project in the course of the year because I felt like we didn’t need to be two to do this project and because it didn’t inspired me anymore. And when I don’t feel drawn to something, I can’t completely dive into it. So, I went on a solo project, just me, myself and I. I thought for a while about the representation of myself, and because I am not a fan of portraits, I chose a radiology image of a skull. Then, I tried to figure out a way of expressing myself through it, express my complicated mind to somebody else, even though I didn’t even really know myself. And the whole time, the answer what right in front of me: the complexity of my mind! The human brain is so complicated that the only way I found to embody it was a Rubik’s Cube. So I took the picture of one and stuck it on the image of the skull. It gave the impression that my brain was a Rubik’s Cube. A Rubik's Cube is colorful and complex, and at the same time a game : it's the way I think my brain is. The Cube can be a true head scratcher, just like the human brain. It can have several aspects and can be just as tricky. In some ways, this work of art also had to explain to the others who I was. But what I hoped was also that, with this piece of art, I would make people ask themselves even more questions.

But, curiously, some of the reactions that I got in the feedback with the public were more about the skull itself than the Cube. They thought about it as a Memento Mori. But it never was my intention (at least consciously) to embody myself as "death". But, looking back on it, I think I can associate this notion of death with something else. Indeed, more than the end of life, this symbol of death also represents change. And for a teenager, who is around fifteen years old, change isn’t just a step into life, it’s a big staircase, and you can’t take the elevator to reach the top! You have to go slowly, step by step, in order to achieve your goals and became who you always were and who is “I”.

I had entitled this project “Watch my mind”, pun intended. I thought it could be a nice see-through into what is going on with me, but also a warning against the reactions of the human brain that can sometimes seem out of sync.

To conclude, I would say that, more than just an artistic project, this was also a nice way to help us, teenagers, figure out who we "really" are, help us discover some unknown characteristics of our mind. But I realize now that even if I put particular intentions into my work, it took me some time to truly understand what was at the back of my mind at the time. Knowing yourself is a journey, and finding out who you are is a process that will go on forever...

I hope that in five years, ten years, fifty years, I will still be surprised by myself and that I will keep improving and growing. I want to be more than who I am. Isn’t that what life is all about?

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