Two years ago, my
Section Européenne class set up an Arts exhibition on the
theme of self-portraits entitled “Me, Myself and I”.
We had to create a unique
and inspired version of ourselves and put it on paper, or on video,
or whatever medium we chose. We tried to define ourselves in a way
we had never thought about before, and yet, it still had to match our
personalities.
I started the project
with a friend based on the theme “If I were Black or Asian”.
We took portraits of ourselves and “Photoshoped” them in order to
create another “us”. Our intention was to show the public that no
matter where you come from, what you look like, your appearance
doesn’t change who you truly are. On another level, we tried to
answer certain questions, or at least unravel teenagers’ wonderings
about change. Because it is a troubling period where everything
changes, your body, your mind, your friends… We showed them that
even if you physically evolve in this period of your life, you don’t
necessarily erase what made you who you are. You remain the same, you
are just different : you are growing...
But, I abandoned this
project in the course of the year because I felt like we didn’t
need to be two to do this project and because it didn’t inspired me
anymore. And when I don’t feel drawn to something, I can’t
completely dive into it. So, I went on a solo project, just me,
myself and I. I thought for a while about the representation of
myself, and because I am not a fan of portraits, I chose a radiology
image of a skull. Then, I tried to figure out a way of expressing
myself through it, express my complicated mind to somebody else, even
though I didn’t even really know myself. And the whole time, the
answer what right in front of me: the complexity of my mind! The
human brain is so complicated that the only way I found to embody it
was a Rubik’s Cube. So I took the picture of one and stuck it on
the image of the skull. It gave the impression that my brain was a
Rubik’s Cube. A Rubik's Cube is colorful and complex, and at the
same time a game : it's the way I think my brain is. The Cube can be
a true head scratcher, just like the human brain. It can have several
aspects and can be just as tricky. In some ways, this work of art
also had to explain to the others who I was. But what I hoped was
also that, with this piece of art, I would make people ask themselves
even more questions.
But, curiously, some of
the reactions that I got in the feedback with the public were more
about the skull itself than the Cube. They thought about it as a
Memento Mori. But it never was my intention (at least consciously) to
embody myself as "death".
But, looking back on it, I think I can associate this notion of death
with something else. Indeed, more than the end of life, this symbol
of death also represents change. And for a teenager, who is around
fifteen years old, change isn’t just a step into life, it’s a big
staircase, and you can’t take the elevator to reach the top! You
have to go slowly, step by step, in order to achieve your goals and
became who you always were and who is “I”.
I had entitled this
project “Watch my mind”, pun intended. I thought it could
be a nice see-through into what is going on with me, but also a
warning against the reactions of the human brain that can sometimes
seem out of sync.
To conclude, I would say
that, more than just an artistic project, this was also a nice way to
help us, teenagers, figure out who we "really"
are, help us discover some unknown characteristics of our mind. But I
realize now that even if I put particular intentions into my work, it
took me some time to truly understand what was at the back of my mind
at the time. Knowing yourself is a journey, and finding out who you
are is a process that will go on forever...
I hope that in five
years, ten years, fifty years, I will still be surprised by myself
and that I will keep improving and growing. I want to be more than
who I am. Isn’t that what life is all about?
